I’ve always been a shy baby when I’ve to talk to girls whom I don’t know well. My hands start shivering and my tongue begins to fail. But there are some times where in you have to face the worst fears of your life. The same thing happened to me last week when I got stuck with a girl who could speak only English.
That day,I got down at Minerva circle and was waiting for the signal to cross the road. That’s when I saw Ms.F standing 10 feet away from me. Gynophobia!!This is one of those times when I really wish that I had one of those Harry Potter’s invisibility cloaks…
There were three options before me. One was to turn back and leave the arena. The second was to pretend like I haven’t seen her at all and the last one was to talk to her. I was pondering over the options when F turned and smiled at me. I could still have all the options to escape, but i smiled back at her. Oh my God!!What have I done?? Now I had to talk to her.
I was wondering what to talk. With in a second, everything that I had ever known or heard flashed in my mind. My head was going dizzy. I slowly walked up to her and “Which class now ,F?”, I asked her.
F: “ACA, I think”. She said in her strange accent.
“He wont say anything right?. It’s already ten past nine”.
Me: “naa, he will let us in.No problem”.
This was followed by an awkward silence. I was searching for the topic I could talk. For me, talking with her was a 3 Pass process. In the first pass, I’d form a list of all the sentences that I can say. In the second, I’d choose the most appropriate sentence for the situation. And in the final pass, I’d translate my thoughts into English. Though the first two passes could be done in a small amount of time, given my proficiency in English, it ‘d take at least 10 seconds to translate a sentence. So there’ll be a gap of a minimum of 12 seconds between her saying something and me replying to it.
Okay, the signal went red , the flow of vehicles stopped and we started to move. I asked “Howz your project going?”. She said ” We have just started. It’s very difficult………..”. I couldn’t understand the rest of what she said. I just assumed that she hasn’t said anything very important and said “what’s your project neway?”. She gave me a strange look. Probably she had said everything about her project to me in her last answer. I didnt know.. “What’s your project?”, she asked. Now at last, I could talk something… I told her everything…. SMS thing, me n A’s experiment, the current status…everything.. “Hey, What’s your Project Team?” she asked.
Was that a question??? Everybody in the college knows that ABC are and will always be together… N I’m sure that she knew about AP… Then why the question? I was really angry. But I was not sure that I ‘ll be able to convey all my feelings in English . So I just told her “me, A, C n AP”… “Oh ok..” ,she said.. Then she said something.. All I could understand was one word. ‘JAVA’. But it was not entirely my fault… She has a strange accent. She can use the word ‘yes’ in 5 different ways to mean 5 different things.. How can you expect a frightened gynophobiac to understand something like that??
Then it went on and on, n finally we were in college… For the first time in my life, I was very happy to enter the class room.. We didn’t bother to ask BTH’s permission. We got in. She went to her place to sit and I, as usual, went to the place where A n C were sitting to narrate the whole story.
After my discussion with VRT and Radish, I’ve come to a conclusion that I’m not at all a gynophobiac, but some kind of an anglo-gynophobiac (which, according to me, is the fear of females who can speak only english!)
well I can only guess whom you are trying to bring focus on.
I must say You have one heck of a syndrome.:P
Dude, she told me that she can speak some Konkani too.. Or was it Tulu? I dont remember.. Try learning both.. 😀
Hmm..Well.. It’s Konkani.. and I’m thinking of locking comments for this post 😛